SoI know what you're thinking, right? You're thinking "But Stikky, you are the picture of mental health, I would never call you deranged or a lunatic!" but at the same time you are also thinking "Is that how you spell deranged? And lunatic?" and "what happend to parts I, II, III and V?" So allow me to put your minds at rest..

Firstly, yes, that IS how you spell deranged AND lunatuic and no, I have never been classified as deranged or a lunatic, technically, but to be fair I have never seen a psychiatrist either.. I mean I know what they look like and all but I have never seen one in a professional capacity because they rarely need high end consulting on matters pertaining to flow assurance in oil and gas processing facilities. Strange, but true.. Finally, the other parts, well, allow mw to submit THIS to YOU: romannumeralsgo I, II, III, IV, V, VI so IV is actually 4 in roman numerals so if I'm up to part IV, there would never have been a V because V is the NEXT number, not the PREVIOUS number! HA! Don't you feel stupid now, you can't even count in a dead numerical system that has not been used in anything other than movie production dates for HUNDERDS of years!

This brings me to my next point, conveniently; salad. Why salad? Because Julius Caesar invented the salad in 1942 when the russians demanded he create a tasty dish out of what was left in their rabbit's food bowl. Julius was, of course, a dictator of the roman empire, roman numerals, see? Now if that didnt wholeheartedly convince you of my sanity, I'm pretty sure the kid that serves me salad at the cafe outside my work has it in for me. I always give him looks of contempt (cuz I'm better than him, see?) and today he gave me less good bits (chicken, croutons, egg, those good bits) in my salad than I have previously obtained from the girl who clearly has a crush on me. This upsets me and I must seek swift and appropriate vengance on him and his loved ones.

So this brings me, once again, just as conveniently, to my next point; finding an apartment. (God, do I have to explain EVERYTHING to you people.. Eggs and croutons are all kinds of toppings for salads.. If you give each letter of the alphabet a numeric value from 1-26, as in A=1 B=2 etc, and subtract "E+G+G" from "C+R+O+U+T+O+N+S" and add 2, because there's two of them, you geta numberwhich is equal to "A+P+A+R+T+M+E+N+T". Duh.) I have recently been informed that two of the girls in my office are considering moving out together, which is awesome, cuz there's a possibility that i might be able to live with them Living with two chicks would be awesome, I can't live with guys, they cramp my style and plus, these girls won't try and stal my women, hopefully

So moving onto something completely unrelated, for a change, I think I may have to leave it there.. Would you guys like a funny picture to go out on? I bet you would, so here is one that I like very much because, well, I love me some red bull...

***SPOILER***

Women really should not drive..

On that note, ladies, gentlemen and misc., I shall bid you all a good evening.. Remember, if it's bleeding, it means that you're picking at it too much.. Or not enough.. Sound advice to live by.

EDIT: Oh, just for fun and as if your body image wasnt sensitive enough, Apple thinks you should be skinnier:

Link.

Thanks Apple, I'll keep that in mind..

EDIT (again): Picture looked naff, click the link to see it.