Number Five

Californication by Red Hot Chili Peppers

(1999)

1. Around the World

2. Parallel Universe

3. Scar Tissue

4. Otherside

5. Get on Top

6. Californication

7. Easily

8. Porcelain

9. Emit Remmus

10. I Like Dirt

11. This Velvet Glove

12. Savior

13. Purple Stain

14. Right on Time

15. Road Trippin'

John Frusciante's return to the Red Hot Chili Peppers was a huge deal for me after being thoroughly disappointed by Dave Navarro on One Hot Minute. On Californication, there is a good mix of songs to rock out to, but you can also hear Frusciante's influence on some of the lighter, and better tracks of the album such as Scar Tissue, Road Trippin', and Porcelain. And as always, all the awesome guitar pieces in this Chili Peppers album are backed by equally awesome bass, drums, and vocals.

Here's my picks for the top 5 sappy love songs. Most are incredibly overdone, but these are the perfect songs fir when you're feeing especially in love.

1. Someone to Die For- Jimmy Gnecco & Brian May

2. Angie- The Rolling Stones

3. Stellar- Incubus

4. I Could Die For You- Red Hot Chili Peppers

5. Starlight- Muse

Number Six

Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness by The Smashing Pumpkins

(1995)

•1. Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness

•2. Tonight, Tonight

•3. Jellbelly

•4. Zero

•5. Here is No Why

•6. Bullet With Butterfly Wings

•7. To Forgive

•8. **** You (An Ode to No One)

•9. Love

•10. Cupid de Locke

•11. Galapagos

•12. Muzzle

•13. Porcelina of the Vast Oceans

•14. Take Me Down

•15. Where Boys Fear to Tread

•16. Bodies

•17. Thirty-Three

•18. In the Arms of Sleep

•19. 1979

•20. Tales of A Scorched Earth

•21. Thru the Eyes of Ruby

•22. Stumbleine

•23. X.Y.U.

•24. We Only Come Out at Night

•25. Beautiful

•26. Lily (My One and Only)

•27. By Starlight

•28. Farewell and Goodnight

Mellon Collie is an excellent example of a band at their best. This album is all you'd ever need by The Smashing Pumpkins. It covers all their sounds: Light, airy music like Tonight, Tonight and 1979, hard rock like Zero and Bullet With Butterfly Wings, and heavy, grinding guitar work in **** You and Jellbelly. I absolutely love diverse albums, and Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness is the most diverse and complete album of all time. To top it off, Billy Corgan's poetry is on par with that of Jim Morrison.

So this is my list of 5 bands that I don't like. I've left off stuff like Miley Cyrus and N'Sync because frankly, there's far too much pop music I can't stand. So really this is more a list of the only 5 rock bands I will not listen to. Of course, I'm not entirely ignorant and I have listen to all of these bands thoroughly before deciding I didn't want to listen to them.

5. My Chemical Romance. I think Marilyn Manson hit the nail on the head with these guys in saying "I'm embarrassed to be me because these people are doing a really sad, pitiful, shallow version of what I've done." Because it's entirely true. The fact that a bunch of weird kids who can't even play their designated instruments well and write shallow "The whole world's against me" lyrics can jump on the emo scene bandwagon and get famous just plain sickens me.

4. David Bowie. A lot of people may get mad about this one, because it's true that David Bowie has had a lot of influence on music. He's even good for a laugh in movies for me. (Labyrinth and Zoolander, anyone?) People call him "The chameleon of rock" and they idolize him for it. But I find that's the very thing wrong with his music. All Bowie did was follow fads in music for three decades, and there were always other bands doing it better. Because he was never someone who came up with his own thing. Except for that freaky space thing. But I want no part of that.

3. Faith No More. I find Faith No More's music incredibly obnoxious and overdone, and not in a cool way like The Pixies or something. It's just... obtrusive. People say they're influential, but all they did was influence the mediocre nu metal of the nineties like Limp Bizkit, which is not something to be proud of in my opinion. On top of their music being annoying, Mike Patton is just a flat out jerk. Case in point.

2. Coldplay. If you want to talk about a musician (and I use that term lightly) that thinks far too much of himself, Chris Martin's your man, and Coldplay's your band. Coldplay's music is so incredibly wrapped up in Chris Martin's ego that it gets tough to listen to without thinking to yourself "Wow, this guy's a douchebag." Not to mention the fact that it's obvious that they're desperately trying to be what Radiohead already is, a soothing alt rock band. The problem is, we already have Radiohead and they're already so much better. If you listen closely to Coldplay's music, you'll also notice that the drummer knows how to play only one thing, which he uses is damn near every song.

1. Slipknot. This is not music. This is a band that plays with no regard for what makes a song a song. They smash on their instruments with wreckless abandon for 6 minutes, throw in some growling "lyrics" about maggotting with the maggots and call it a song. I think part of their terrible sound comes from the fact that there's too many band members. Eight of them to be exact. In each song, your ears are attacked by far too much noise. They're clearly more into theatrics that making music as well, what with the ridiculous masks they insist on wearing. Apparently it makes them edgier, but to me it's just stupid. Almost as bad as their music is their fans, Maggots as they call them. These Maggots are so hell-bent on proving that Slipknot is the best thing since sliced bread that it will literally drive you crazy trying to prove them wrong.

Number Seven

(1971)

1. Black Dog

2. Rock and Roll

3. The Battle of Evermore

4. Stairway to Heaven

5. Misty Mountain Hop

6. Four Sticks

7. Going to California

8. When the Levee Breaks

Led Zeppelin IV is the album that inspired the sound of every rock band to follow. It's the definitive hard rock album. Every song on it screams rock and roll. It rocks from the intense intro of Black Dog to the soulful end of When the Levee Breaks. If you want to introuduce someone to rock music, this is where to start, because it will completely blow their mind. Every instrument on each track is played with such precision, and it makes for some awesome songs.