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June 24, 2006--#175
And now for Part 2!
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Bart: Well, can I go see the movie?
Homer: I know my punishment's harsh, but I can't back down on it. You're welcome to watch whatever you want on TV.
Bart: TV sucks.
Homer: I know you're upset right now, so I'll pretend you didn't say that.
-The Simpsons
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Digg thisJune 23, 2006--#174
I'm going to do something I haven't done yet: a 2-part diaologue. Frankly, I find both parts of the conversation funny. Enjoy!
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Homer Simpson: Someday, you'll thank for this, son.
Bart Simpson: Not bloody likely.
Homer: No, it's true! You know, when I was a boy, I really wanted a catcher's mitt, but my dad wouldn't get it for me. So I held my breath until I passed out and banged my head on the coffee table. Doctors say I might have brain damage!
Bart: Dad? What's the point of this story?
Homer: I like stories.
June 22, 2006--#173
"You know, I thought I've heard everything. But I've never heard of a relationship being affected by puntuation.
-Jerry Signfeld, Signfeld
June 21, 2005--#172
"It's a big commitment, waiting all this time for the show. How do you explain this to your imaginary girlfriend?"
-Triumph, Late Night with Conan O'Brien
June 20, 2006--#171
Telephone Voice: "For automated stock prices, please state the company name."
Homer Simpson: "Animotion."
Voice: "Animotion, up 1 1/2.
Homer: "Yahoo!"
Voice: "Yahoo, up 6 1/4."
Homer: "Huh? What is this crap?"
Voice: "Fox Broadcasting, down 8."
-The Simpsons
June 19, 2006--#170
"When you make contact with the ball, you rarely have a chance of striking out."
-Mike Patrick, Miami vs. Rice college baseball playoff game
June 18, 2006--#169
"That's all you men do. Take, take, take! You don't care about me or the feelings of unicorns!"
-Lisa Simpson, The Simpsons
June 17, 2006--#168
"Yeah, well, it may be stupid, but it's also dumb."
-Patrick Star, Spongebob Squarepants
June 16, 2006--#167
"Ha! I know you can't talkm and you know why? Because you are pants! So zip it!"
-Hugh Neutron, The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius
June 15, 2006--#166
"I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Democracy simply doesn't work."
-Kent Brockman, The Simpsons
June 14, 2006--#165
"Action, action, action! What am I talking about? I'm talking about ACTION!!!......and some comedy."
-Announcer for Toonami
June 13, 2006--#164
"Ugh...my feet...my bladder control...they're both gone!"
-Sheen Estavez, The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius
June 12, 2006--#163
"I guess there are some things we're not supposed to know. I mean, look at me! I go through half my life not knowing what's going on!
-Joey Wheeler, Yu-Gi-Oh!
June 11, 2006--#162
"Observe how I refrain from jumping up and down."
-Allister, Viewtiful Joe
June 10, 2006--#161
"Eh, making teenagers depressed is like shooting fish in a barrel."
-Bart Simpson, The Simpsons
June 9, 2006--#160
"Oh, I just pasted pages from the phone book together. I call it 'Attack of the People Named Frank Johnson!!'"
-Sheen Estavez, The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius
June 8, 2006--#159
"Okay, I can deal with not winning the hat, but why am I in a cage?"
-Digit, Cyberchase
June 7, 2006--#158
"Yeah, well I eat Froot Loops like you for breakfast."
-Lisa Simpson, The Simpsons
June 6, 2006 "Omen Day"--#157
"Great. Not only am I a speck of dust, I'm a speck of dust with homework on the weekend."
-Buster Baxter, Arthur
June 5, 2006--#156
"As soon as we get that scratch-and-sniff television, we'll let you know."
-Alton Brown, Iron Chef America
