As many of you don't know The Dark Enigma is my Myspace name, and as you know I am full of darkness but I wasent always so this is the story of my life, for 12 years of my life I had no darkness, I was happy, I was popular, I could make people laugh, but in 2005 two of the people that meant the most to me died and I never healed from that, The darkness then sank in turning me into what I am today, and everytime I have a way to get rid of this pain and suffering I screw it up, and thats my story, now for some bad news I will be getting myself banned in 2 days so this is James saying good-bye for good

I know that in my last blog I said it would be my final farewell but things have happened to me in that span of time on the night of the day I left for reason unknown I collapsed and was taken to the hospitol and for a small moment when I was there I died and when I did I heard voices of all my friends here at GS and at school they were saying "Don't die Jeff" and "Don't die James" and 2 voices stood out the most one calling me Jeff which was a guys voice and one calling me James and it was a girls voice the girl I knew, it was the same girl that recently broke my heart and the guy I don't know even till this day but anyway when I did finally wake up I asked Matt if it was too late to come back he looked at the time and told me it wasI was then speechless for the rest of the night, about 2 weeks ago when my heart became broken I feel into a deep state of depression and I did many things I wouldent normally do, I got rid of my Jeff name saying I would never return and telling Amos to call me James from now on but today when I finally got over that depression I decided to change everything I had done and decided to come back after asking Amos if a person is ever forgiven of their past and so here I am today defiantly a changed person but it feels great to be back

now lets crack open some beers and I had a return video but its being so slow it might be tomorrow before its done so ill just update this when its done

I decided to put this now but I will be here till 12 a.m.

Well I guess by now everyone knows what day it is, since it was well advertised well by Amos, but as you may not know it is hard for me to do this, but I know it must happen, and maybe ill be back someday, but I will truly miss everyone here and thank you for being my friend and for being there for me to talk to when I need someone to talk to, I would say forget I ever excisted and just move on, but it seems Amos has made it so I will never be forgotten, so *pulls out huge strero* The Memory will Never Die.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=OaWwv2p55VI

So Good-Bye everyone, and I hope to see you all in the future, oh and I will still be on Brawl just ask Amos a.k.a FullMetalWWant for my code and give yours to him and he'll get it to me, but now ill say a few words to a few people

Soaring, you have been a bigger help then you could imagine when I was feeling down you were there and you'd listen to everything I say so thank you

Shan, after that night where you said I should just pray and Aj would hear my words, I would never forget you because that was a big help, that night

TPK, your poems are great, and I will get Amos to send them to me so I can continue reading them

Aj, I will say my words to you in a prayer

And of course saving the best for last my best friend Amos

Amos, I want you to watch over everyone and the union here, continue to be a help to them, and thank you for being a friend to a loner like me, and remaining a friend even through the arguments we had, I will never forget you

Good-bye my friends

*A video plays, as I walk away*

http://youtube.com/watch?v=j_7pW78mkX8

I was happy that day that my life got back in line and I was able to come back to GS. But exactly one hour from when I posted my return blog Amos put his up about Aj's death. So I read it and when I got to the part "there were no survivors" those words raced in my head over and over I tried to fight back the tears but couldn't, and memories of the past kept rushing to my head. As soon as the memories and the tears stopped the first thing that came to my head is "How's Amos" so I had to check with him. He and I then talked in a PM and on the blog for a while, up until he got off really. As soon as he was off I got right to work on the tag he wanted me to make even though it was late at night. The only other thing I remember is posting on Aj's blog saying "AJ I wish you could read this but I miss you so much you were my friend and ill never forget you I promise I won't" I also remember going to tears several more times that night.

I then started working on things I could dedicate to Aj and I still am working on them and will be for a while, and still to this day it feels like none of the pain of loss has been taken away. I don't know what Aj would think of it but here I am again in tears while writing this.

Recently people have been asking me how I feel (mostly outside of GS) and my mother accused me of being on drugs for the thrid time so just here's some lyrics to explain how I feel

Papa Roach Scars

I tear my heart open, I saw myself shut
My weakness is that I care too much
And our scars remind us that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel

Papa Roach Broken Home

I can't seem to fight these feelings
I'm caught in the middle of this
And my wounds are not healing

Papa Roach Last Resort

Would it be wrong
Would it be right
If I took my life tonight
Chances are that I might
Mutilation out of sight
And I'm contemplating suicide

Cause I'm losing my sight,
Losing my mind,
Wish somebody would tell me I'm fine

Rise Against Ready to Fall

Wings won`t take me
Heights don`t phase me
So take a step
But don`t look down, take a step

Now I`m standing on the rooftop ready to fall I think I'm at the edge now but I could be wrong
I'm standing on the rooftop ready to fall

Rise Against Injection

Keep me alive,
Give me what's left of my life,
Don't let me go. whoa
Pull this plug,
Let me breathe,
On my own I'm finally free,
Don't let me go. woah

Rise Against The Good Left Undone

Not a day goes by when I don't feel this burn.
There's a point we pass from which we can't return.
I felt the cold rain of the coming storm...

Thats only a few ill be updating it later