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And that's the bottom line, because Magi said so.
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Digg thisMagi's First College Essay!
If you're reading this journal, you've been wondering where I've been the past couple of weeks or how my first days of freedom as a college freshman have gone. Needless to say, I've thoroughly enjoyed myself through partaking in a dangerous combination of reading, writing, arithmetic, getting jacked out of my mind, 2:00 AM fire drills, wild and sloppy orgies (sorry BC), and much much more. However, at the end of the day it's the work that really counts, and I've spent quite a while (the past hour) crafting fine-tuned masterpieces such as the one below -- my first college essay! The topic involved making a 1-2 page self-assessment of both yourself and your writing ability, which I believe I accomplished with flying colors. Don't expect anything Michael Jackson-caliber here, but get ready for some damn good writing and a closer look at the man behind the Magi name.
The State of My Writing
The self-assessment is a useful and accessible tool not only for examining one’s strengths and weaknesses, but also for developing a better understanding for who one really is. Featuring an endless amount of topical possibilities, self-assessments may range from evaluations of one’s artistic ability to considerations of one’s zebra riding skills. However, in order to achieve success in such an endeavor, one must examine and recognize all facets of his being – the good, the bad, and the ugly – and strive to both capitalize on his strengths and remedy his inadequacies. Writing is a unique topic in the sense that no matter how well-versed one is in the subject, he always has room for improvement. While my academic surroundings and personal activities have benefited my development as a writer, not even my mother, who has hammered grammatical rules into me since my infancy, has rendered me an exception to this standard. Such an upbringing has made me a talented writer, yet my improvement potential remains boundless, a fact that I must capitalize on throughout my college experience.
Harnessing this potential should prove to be an interesting and difficult task because my greatest strengths and weaknesses as a reader, writer, and thinker are intertwined. On one hand, I believe that my imagination in each of these fields is my strongest suit. I constantly strive to spin my words in such a way that I can both surprise the reader and maintain his interest. The same holds true with my preferences as a reader in the sense that I favor creative writing that may or may not border on the outlandish. This creativity, coupled with sound grammatical techniques and a willingness to explore virtually any subject, gives my writing a style and flow that is uniquely my own.
Unfortunately, my creativity is both a blessing and a curse in writing, as well as in everything else I do. My spontaneous style often evokes my personality’s self-indulgent side, the one that wanders off on random (albeit interesting) tangents when it should be focusing more important tasks at hand. This self-indulgence also manifests itself in my writing through unnecessary wordiness, wild compound-complex sentence structures, disinterest in thoroughly editing my work, occasional tirades about the New York Mets’ pitching staff or Michael Jackson’s mansion in essays where neither subject bears any relevance, and a general lack of organization. However, as a fat boy enjoys inhaling dozens of luscious, onion-laden hamburgers at White Castle, I too take pleasure in indulging myself. As a result, I appreciate writing assignments where I am free to use as much fluffy language as I wish, as well as reading material that takes a similar approach. On the other hand, this renders reading and writing experiences that require concise language and attention to detail uninteresting and nearly unbearable to me. Fortunately, I understand that such writing has its merits and that in order to appreciate it I must give it a chance and make an honest effort to try working within its boundaries.
The college years are not only a time of physical and mental maturation for students, but also for discovering who one really is. Self-assessments are valuable tools for finding one’s true place in the world, and reading, writing, and thinking in general can aid one in reaching this realization. As a writer and a newly instated college freshman, I hope to make the most of my opportunities and to utilize self-assessments like this to constantly evaluate my writing ability and my life as a whole
Yet Another Maginalogy
Rate Today's Purchases!
One Grande-Sized Vanilla Latte
After
that refreshing cup of coffee, I relaxed a bit, paroused through
today's paper, and worked out. Following that was a momentous occasion
in my life, one that may have been even more important than my 4001st
post. After four and a half years of owning my trusty, dusty, and
antenna-less Motorola cellphone, I finally put it to rest to buy
something completely new.
LG VX6000 Cameraphone
So,
after calling a couple of my friends and taking several naked pictures
of myself, I figured I'd go out, see the world, and continue buying
awesome stuff. Little did I know that the best was yet to come. Two
friends and I proceeded to go on a mission to the Salvation Army to
find awesome t-shirts. Instead of finding any noteworthy T's, I was
shocked to find that one amazing brand name had made a cameo appearance
at everybody's favorite thrift store.
Abercrombie and Fitch
No,
half-naked male models didn't suddenly come waltzing into the Salvation
Army (I was already there and it was 95 degrees out, so that store was
hot enough to begin with), but I waltzed out of the store with an
awesome pair of Abercrombie Corduroy pants that cost five dollars.
Whereas some people pay upwards of 200 dollars for latest trendy designer pants,
I paid five for something from the same brand. While God only knows
where those pants had been or what happened inside them, I can now die
a happy man knowing that I bought Abercrombie pants for five dollars.
After that, I bought a slice of Sicilian pizza.
Minus the pepperoni, of course.
Let the ownage begin!
That's One Expensive Infant!
Million Dollar Baby, which Eastwood both starred in and directed, proves no exception to his general rule of thumb -- even in his mid-70's, this man continues to shock audiences by delivering amazing performances as an actor and thought-provoking, imaginitive scenarios as a director. It's no surprise that awesome groups like Gorillaz choose to honor him in song, even if he's wholly unrelated to the subject matter! Check it!
Hey, I'm happy, I'm feeling glad
I got sunshine in a bag
I'm usless but not for long
The future is coming on
Hey, I'm happy, I'm feeling glad
I got sunshine in a bag
I'm usless but not for long
The future is coming on
It's coming on, it's coming on
(Rah, yeah)
It's coming on, it's coming on
Finally someone let me out of my cage
Now time for me is nothin' 'cos I'm counting no age
Now I couldn't be there now you shouldn't be scared
I'm good at repairs and I'm under each snare
Intangible (ah y'all) I bet you didn't think so
I command u to, panoramic view (you)
Look I'll make it all manageable
Pick and choose, sit and lose
All you different crews
Chicks and dudes, who you think is really kicking tunes
Picture you getting down IN A PICTURE TUBE
Like you lit the fuse
You think it's fictional, mystical - maybe
Spiritual hero who appears IN you to clear your view (yeah)
When you're too crazy
Lifeless for THOSE A definition for what life is
Priceless to you because I put ya on the hype shift
Ya like it?
GUN smokin' righteous but one talkin' psychic
Among knows possess you with one though
Hey, I'm happy, I'm feeling glad
I got sunshine in a bag
I'm usless but not for long
The future is coming on
Hey, I'm happy, I'm feeling glad
I got sunshine in a bag
I'm useless but not for long
(That's right)
The future is coming on
It's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming on
The essence, the basics without it you make it
Allow me to make this child like IN nature
Rhythm you have it or you don't
That's a fallacy, I'm in them
Every sprout and tree, every child of peace
Every cloud and sea, you see with your eyes
You see destruction and demise
(That's right)
Corruption in the skies
From this ****ing enterprise that i'm suked into your lies
THROUGH Russell NOT HIS muscles
BUT percussion he provides
WITH ME AS YOUR GUIDE, y'all can see me now
'Cos you don't see with your eye
You perceive with your mind
That's the end (**** em)
So I'm gonna stick around with Russ and be a mentor
Bust a few RHYMES of mother****ers
Remember but the thought is
I brought all this so you can survive when law is lawless(right
here)
FEELINGS, sensations that you thought was dead
No squealing, remember it's all in your head
I ain't happy, I'm feeling glad
I got sunshine in a bag
I'm usless but not for long
The future is coming on
Hey, I'm happy, I'm feeling glad
I got sunshine in a bag
I'm usless but not for long
The future is coming on
It's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming
on...
My Future (future)
It's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming
on...
My future
It's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming on, it's coming
on...
Anyway, back to the point I was trying to make, Clint Eastwood is a veritable cinematic God in my opinion.
Feel free to worship him, post impressions of Million Dollar Baby, or spam in response to this entry!
But above all, please go out and see Million Dollar Baby.
Recent Reviews
1. Back in the USSR - McCartney opens the album with a sharp and clever Beach Boys knockoff about a horrible airplane ride and some chicks from the Ukraine that he'd probably never seen in his life. Great!
2. Dear Prudence - An absolutely beautiful ballad from John Lennon. This song constantly builds from its soft introduction to a roaring conclusion. One of The White Album's best tracks.
3. Glass Onion - A throwaway, in my opinion. Lennon sings about some of the Beatles' past songs (Strawberry Fields, Fool on the Hill, Fixing a Hole, etc.) and even contributes to the "Paul Is Dead" rumors (Here's another clue for you all -- the Walrus was Paul). It's fun the first time, but there's not much here. 4. Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da - A nauseatingly poppy song from Paul. Fun, and almost ska-like.
5. Wild Honey Pie - Random. At a shade over one minute, this is the shortest track on the White Album. I always like the acoustic lick at the end.
6. The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill - Another fun song, this time coming from John. Yoko makes a cameo in this song!
7. While My Guitar Gently Weeps - This track begins an "amazing song" streak on The White Album. George's best work up to that point. Eric Clapton plays lead guitar and puts together an achingly beautiful solo -- it really sounds like his guitar is crying! One of the best tracks on The White Album.
8. Happiness is a Warm Gun - My favorite song on this album. "HiaWG" is a short suite of what could have been five different songs. Man, John Lennon was a genius. His lyrics here, especially in the first part, are dripping with creative wit...even if they are about heroin. John sings some excellent falsetto lines in the last section, which is clearly about sex. All metaphorical meanings aside, this is a simply brilliant track, and certainly one of the best on the White Album.
9. Martha My Dear - Another Grandma song from Paul. I like this one a lot, even if he did actually write it for his dog (Martha). Good track.
10. I'm So Tired - Another song about sleep by the Beatles. Great lyrics and vocals here from John. There's backmasking on the end of this one. Play it backwards and it says "Paul is dead. Miss him, miss him, MISS HIM!" Scary.
11. Blackbird - One of Paul McCartney's most famous songs, "Blackbird" is an excellent acoustic song that everyone's heard before. It might be about the civil rights movement. However, you don't need to read into this song's lyrics to appreciate it -- like so many of the Beatles' songs, its beauty can be found in its simplicty. Great song.
12. Piggies - Another one of my favorite tracks from this album. George goes back to his "Taxman" ways and puts out some poignant social commentary here, although this time it's a little less blatant. The little piggies represent the people in the Rat Race, and the bigger piggies represent the people in charge. Two great lines in this song are "What they need's a damn good whacking!" and, my personal favorite, "you can see them out to dinner with their piggie wives/clutching forks and knives/to eat their bacon!" Simply brilliant!
13. Rocky Raccoon - A Western tale from Paul. Another great story song -- Paul was great at doing that. One of my favorites.
14. Don't Pass Me By - The first song Ringo ever wrote on his own. This one sounds very country-ish. Personally, I think it's kind of a throwaway, especially when compared to the rest of the material on this album.
15. Why Don't We Do it in the Road? - That's it -- why don't we do it in the road? This is certainly the funniest moment on the White Album. Between the stupid-sounding drum rhythm and piano chords in the background and Paul's repetition of that one line (plus "No one will be watching us), this song is hilarious. 16. I Will - Paul follows up a song that would be considered "shockingly obscene" by some parents at the time with this saccharine, simple love ballad that I'm sure all of them would appreciate. Brilliant placement! 17. Julia - A stunningly beautiful ballad from John. Heartfelt, sincere, and achingly beautiful (there I go again with that word), "Julia" is an absolute masterpiece. John wrote this about his mother and Yoko (Ocean Child). One of the best tracks on the White Album.
18. Birthday - Paul opens disc two with this fun number, a 12-bar-blues that everybody's heard before. The Beatles really rock out on this song. Good stuff.
19. Yer Blues - Lennon takes a shot at the then-current British blues scene with "Yer Blues." Of course, his lyrics here are exaggerated (He keeps talking about how he's "gonna die"), so many view this as a Blooze parody. Regardless, John delivers these lines straight-faced. Another quality track.
20. Mother Nature's Son - A really soft song from Paul, who paints the scene of a boy living in the countryside. More simple beauty. Again!
21. Everybody's Got Something To Hide Except Me and My Monkey - Long title, fun song. Supposedly, it's about heroin, but I'm not too sure why. I could do without this track, but it's fun to listen to nonetheless.
22. Sexy Sadie - Lennon writes about the Maharashi in this one. As one would expect, John delivers on this one with witty, scornful lyrics. One of the better tracks on the White Album.
23. Helter Skelter - Paul McCartney really delivers here with what was, at the time of its release, the hardest song ever! The Beatles proved here that they could rock as hard as anyone, and I think this is the best track on the White Album. Obviously, this one's associated with the Charles Manson Fiasco. Regardless, this is one awesome song!
24. Long, Long, Long - In another case of brilliant placement, the Beatles follow their hardest song ever with their softest ballad. This is a great George song that, like much of the second disc, grows on the listener. Supposedly, George wrote this song about God. The ending is kind of weird. Great track.
25. Revolution 1 - While John's fast version of this song ("Revolution") is certainly better, "Revolution 1" is no slouch. One important difference between the songs (besides the instrumental and tempo changes) is Lennon's "but when you talk about destruction" line. In the fast version, Lennon says that "you can count me out," but in this one he adds "...in" to the end of that line. Great lyrics on a slow, bluesy and almost druggy-sounding instrumental backdrop. Another disc 2 track that grows on the listener.
26. Honey Pie - Quite the opposite of "Wild Honey Pie," this is another one of Paul's music hall/Grandma songs. A fun song, even if I personally don't like it too much.
27. Savoy Truffle - Another classic from George Harrison! This song is about Eric Clapton's love of sweets. While that might sound kind of...interesting, to say the least, this is really one of the better tracks on the album. Best line -- "We all know Ob-la-di-bla-da...but can you tell me who you are?" Great!
28. Cry Baby Cry - Lennon takes a page out of Syd Barret's book and writes this storybook-like song. It may be kind of trippy (after all, he is trying to emulate Pink Floyd), but this is such an interesting track, musically but especially lyrically. It grows on you. The "Can You Take Me Back" ending is really cool.
29. Revolution 9 - I don't know what to make of this "track" (it's certainly not a song). Scary. Lennon once claimed that "this was the future of music." I listen to it sometimes -- whether you like it or not, you have to admit that it's damn interesting. The Beatles drop the F-Bomb in this song, but you have to look for it! Backmasking -- "turn me on, dead man."
30. Good Night - In the final case of brilliant track placement on The White Album, the Beatles follow up the nightmare of "Revolution 9" with this calming conclusion, featuring Ringo on vocals. It's almost like cooing a baby back to sleep after it wakes up from a nightmare. The placement is clever, but this is one of the Beatles' weaker album conclusions -- they're usually very strong ("Tomorrow Never Knows," "A Day in the Life," "All You Need is Love," etc). *Best Tracks*: Dear Prudence, While My Guitar Gently Weeps, Happiness is a Warm Gun, I'm So Tired, Blackbird, Piggies, Julia, Birthday, Sexy Sadie, Helter Skelter, Long, Long, Long, Savoy Truffle, Cry Baby Cry
As one might conclude from the above track reviews, the White Album is an absolute mess. Even if it's not meant to flow well like Abbey Road, its hodgepodge style does make it more difficult to listen to initially than some of the other Beatles' more accessible material. As a result, the White Album is one of those works that one might not appreciate at first -- it will take a few listens, and this album is all the more rewarding because of that. Since it is so unique, I'm not exactly sure of where to rank this on the Beatles' album list. Maybe third or fourth? I don't know. Regardless of where it stands when compared to their other great albums, The White Album is, due to its boundless creativity and the sheer breadth of its stylistic scope, the Beatles' greatest achievement.
Thanks for reading.
You think you can tell us what to do
You think you can tell us what to wear
You think that you're better
Well you'd better get ready
Bow to the masters
Break it down!
