"...they're invented in boardrooms by souless, self-aggrandizing executives looking to make a fast buck by tricking you into thinking you might actually have fun playing their latest science fiction themed action thrill ride -- but this is the reality: this here, in fact, clearly could have been game of the year material just weeks ago, as evidenced alone by the slight shift in the frontalis, coupled by the abnormal tension in the zygomaticus."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwfnzZVYiSI

I can't believe my luck.

I get home with my copy of Halo 3. I am ashamed a bit to admit that I am excited and affected by all of the hype. I grab a beer, get ready to settle in for a fun night and fire up the Xbox to see...

the three red rings of death

Nooooooooooooo!

Man, what HORRIBLE timing. A box is on its way for a return shipment. I think someone is trying to tell me something.

..and still is 100% unique amongst the machinery:

awesome work Roland and Rolls. the buttermelt in FULL effect.

where've you been
where've you been....
you crazy girl

Jup Jup Jup jupa
jup jup jup jupa
jup jup jup jup jupa.....
I've been kidnapped by Neptune

I'm coming to the game late, but Scout Niblett totally rules.

Can we all please have a moment of silence for Charles Nelson Reilly. RIP

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Nelson_Reilly

 

I think the Dead Milkmen put it best in their song "Serrated Edge":

Up on the hilltop where the vultures perch,
That's where I'm gonna build my church,
Ain't gonna be no priest, ain't gonna be no boss;
Just Charles Nelson Reilly nailed to a cross.

Yeah, Charles Nelson Reilly, he's our man,
He can't heal the sick with the touch of his hand,
He can't walk on water, can't make wine flow;
Just another greedy actor on the late late show!

Just me on a hilltop with 15 girls,
In a Nelson Reilly orgy that'll make your hair curl.
I don't piss, I don't **** I'm gettin' no relief,
People shake their heads in disbelief

Future of the Left just blew the roof off of our studio here at SXSW. I now have a new favorite rock band:

http://www.futureoftheleft.com/

Look for video of their performance here in about 24 hours:

http://www.mp3.com/sxsw

Marnie Stern
In Advance of the Broken Arm
(Kill Rock Stars)
Wonderfully weird and fractured pop tunes, overlaid with riff-metal guitar pyrotechnics. It's
incredibly clever and bold in the production and song arrangements, if
not downright experimental -- a super unique mix of killer guitar
hooks, vocal lines and really spacey call-to-arms lyrics.

There's a little math in the arrangements, like the track "Absorb Those Numbers" which is constantly flipping back and forth between different time signatures against these great big melody hooks of "Hey, now... where does it begin?"

When she sings "I'll draw a pyramid, now I'm in the American Revolution"... I'm in. This album has totally grabbed my imagination.

Everything we learned in Civics class is now altered. On October 17th, Bush signed the Military Commissions Act of 2006 into law. This bill changes the essential protective nature of our Constitution and potentially will have ramifications for generations. If there is any one story to learn more about and get brained up on this year, this is the one. It marks a new turn in the continuing erosion of our democracy.

Keith Olberman has been doing a good job of getting the word out about what this all means, with humor and panache. (Watch this clip from 10-11-2006 about what Habeas Corpus is). I am amazed and pleased that a major network is finding the voice to educate and illuminate the current crisis that few are taking the time to fight against, much less even mention. Who would have ever thought the cocky L.A. sportscaster from my youth would grow into this generation's Edward R. Murrow? Below is a transcription from this past Wednesday night's show that breaks down some of the basic freedoms that we have now lost.

This acts as the Yin to my February 13th post's Yang.

I think Peter Molyneux is a wonderful freak. I hate/love his games: love what they aim for, hate where they fall short, but I always am compelled to give them a spin. Hence the older post about Black & White 2. I stopped playing after only one week -- or more accurately, I stopped attempting to play it. My video card was so underpowered: it wasn't worth playing in 640 x 480 and still have to turn details down.

But Lo and Behold: for my birthday, the Gods brought down an ATI Radeon 1900XTX (a lot of Mana was involved). As such, WoW looks insane, Fear and Far Cry can run
with all details jacked up, but it was Black & White 2 that I came
running back to first. So now that I can play it, here's the verdict:

It brings back an even better Populous-style RTS component (love the spells), but I could still give a rat's bun about my creature. I like the side quests they throw at you in each map, more so than the grander 'conquer the land' components. Having said that, as chaotic as the game comes across, I never feel rushed to do any one thing -- even in the later levels it retains more of a sandbox feel, rather than some mad dash towards goals. As with all Molyneux games, feature creep seems to have gotten the better of it... and yet I'm eyeing that expansion pack.

The second week of having a 360 comes to a close. What do I think?

1) Oblivion was worth it
It really was. I lusted for many months and it was worth the effort spent. I have 30 hours logged so far. My girlfriend has taken up the obsession on her own, so now there is jockeying for who gets to spend time in Cyrodil each evening.

2) If you lack an HDTV, VGA kicks ass
The difference between standard TV and my flat panel LCD is stunning. I am not going HD until one of those mammoth plasma screens comes under $2K... so going forward, what used to be the computer monitor now lives in the front room.

3) Xbox Live / Dashboard is Great
Achievement points, demos to download, Xbox Arcade... they are really leading the pack here. We laugh about how this is a novelty because it's on a console, but I really can't see how Sony is going to step to this component. I've stolen Scott and Stephen's idea about keeping voice chat open during Oblivion for some do-it-yourself online play. "Okay, let's go to this location... ready... GO!" Yes, I have bought lame skins, icons and horse armor. It's addictive.

4) Kameo is an excellent and fun game
I had fallen off the Rare bandwagon for many a title now. I have no desire to collect a million things while platforming. My expectations were low for this game, which is perhaps why I am so pleasantly surprised. It moves fast, looks amazing and is super fun. I got lost for five hours my first time sitting with it.

5) The other current titles are so-so
It's true. Condemned: it's dull. Perfect Dark: eh. PGR 3: I guess. Quake 4: frrrtt. Tomb Raider: better, but not some knockout.  GRAW: just started, so hard to tell if the rave ups are dead on... but the assessment for all of these is the same: looks superb, but I feel like I've done all of this before. I'd rather finish Call of Cthulu or check out my $4.99 copy of Scrapland.  Oblivion really ties the next-gen visuals to some next-gen gameplay. The other current titles do not.

6) This thing is a beast
My only fear, post-purchase, is that this box is going to go up in flames. The heat and noise it generates while running is a bit on the worrisome side -- it's certainly not going to be sandwiched in amongst the other entertainment center modules. It needs air and space to groove. For such an expensive purchase, it feels cheaply made. Having said that, this is my first time using a wireless controller with a console and it's rad.

What have we learned?

If you have a VGA or HD setup, enjoy RPGs and don't want to spend a bundle on upgrading your PC to play Oblivion, this is a great option. I'm looking forward to the titles coming down the pike and am excited to be in the game this early on. I haven't played WoW in two weeks. 'Nuff said.

GDC 06: Revolution to play Genesis, TurboGrafx games
http://www.gamespot.com/news/6146528.html

Genesis?  Great move... but TurboGrafx?!  Really?! 

Hello Bonk's Adventure.

Hello Splatterhouse.

It's as nostalgic as getting all excited about a new issue of EGM all over again.

The Elder Scrolls: Oblivion has arrived and I am woefully unprepared.  Much is often made of singular titles that drive a console purchase or a hardware upgrade and while I usually find that kind of logic financially irresponsible, I find myself this week with a serious case of 'the wants' and it's really ugly. We're talking about roughly $675. That's the cost of the new ATI Radeon video card with tax, or conversely, roughly the cost of a XBOX 360 with decent accessories and the game.

I am undecided as to which platform to plunk down on. A new vid card would make all of my current PC titles look smashing and set me up for relevance for at least another two years -- whereas the 360 would jump me into the next-gen game, even though I lack an HDTV of any size.

I could buy a lot of better things with $675: new clothes, pay down a chunk of debt, music gear, pay my taxes early, buy a plane ticket to somewhere exotic... but I find that I really just want to buy the means by which to visit a make believe world in my head. That is sick. This thing with games: it is sickness.

I commend Bethesda for their genius -- their previous open-ended worlds have been unmatched in many ways -- but the insidious desire that has risen within me for this title over the past few weeks speaks to something more that I know many other gamers can relate to... it is a combination of the worst that being raised in a 'me, now' capitalist society installs within us -- to equate consumption with satisfaction -- and the utterly unique experience of getting lost in your head within an incredibly immersive 3D world for weeks on end. Some may cry 'escape from reality,' but for every ounce of escape, I see a pound of imagination enriching experience. The latter half of the mix to me is not an issue. The desire to have to have something NOW is... patience, young Jedi.

So which platform should I upgrade? Beef out my PC or begin the path of 360?

I've been down with Peter Molyneux since Populous. As the demo whet my appetite real nice, I was very excited to get my paws on a shrink-wrapped copy of The Movies. I rushed home to sit down for what looked to be a nice long and late Friday eve, when lo and behold: Disc One was not in the box. Flat out gone. The copy I received was a freebie, but WTF?! What retailer is going to believe this tale?

In the interest of trying to balance out the karmic wheel, I decided I would have to go out and actually shell out cash for a title. I will not pay more than $25 for a game -- that is my rule of thub -- so I put my Movies fix on hold and picked up a used copy of Black and White 2 at a local EB on Saturday. It seemed appropo: another god game from the same overambitious Father of the genre. Get home, install, patch... and then watch the slide show ensue. I am getting crap frame rates at 640 x 480. I have a great machine, but I curse my Radeon X300. I knew that skimping on the video card in a new PC last year was going to haunt me... and it only took 11 months.

God is saying: if you want to take a whack at playing me in 2006, you'll need to spend at least another $500. I love PC games above all others, but this weekend demonstrates exactly why I love $10 Xbox bargain bin diving.

My Console Motto: Slap it in. Play it out. If it sucks, it was ten bucks.

I've read all your raves and have even watched you all on stage at GAME acting like Steve Vai, but I don't own a PS2, so feh...  Then Looby came over one eve with his console and TWO guitar controllers. Yes: Guitar Hero is really fun. I don't know about half of the metal tracks featured in the game (it would be so much more fun to play Black Flag or Devo jams), but that has not stopped me and the ladyfriend from giving each other the crazy eyes over dueling fake plastic guitars at 1:00am on Wednesday nights. Hott. I am torn on whether it actually offers any valuable fingering practice for those that already do play real guitar -- or if it provides any good lessons for those that would want to learn how to play... but that's moot. If they would bring it to Xbox and offer extra downloadable songs, it would be most perfect.

My new rank of level 9 is titled 5 Foot Assassin... as in "with the roughneck business"

whoever came up with this level name, I bow to you. you have made my morning.

I love adventure games. The Infocom glory days of Zork and
Hitchiker's Guide: west of house. The last of the Lucas Arts classics:
Manny Caldera waxes existential. Longest Journey revives the hunt for the group of pixels within the pre-rendered
landscape... but not until Indigo Prophecy has there been the next jump. Long overdue. A compelling story told from many angles in real time, but you choose who and when. Gone is the 'Where's Waldo' inventory aquisition mechanics, reborn as 3d exploration and twitch-based Simon Says. The industry was talkin' smack about interactive movies ten years ago, but it simply took time for our digital actors to gain the ability to make more of an impact upon us than any lame full-motion video could possibly achieve. My first sitting ran four hours. I don't sit at WoW that long.

Speaking of Indigo: the topic of Indigo Children, which a friend turned me on to this past week.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Indigo_children

Is there really some kind of Arthur C. Clarke's 'Childhood's End' generation occuring... or is this simply a boomer-new-age fueled excuse for a whiny and self-important, post-Reagan-capitalistic wave of children? All one has to do is go look at the list of 'What Is An Indigo Child?' over at indigochild.com to read a list comprised of behaviors consistent with an indigo child - traits synonymous with 'big pain in the ass'... and yet wouldn't it be nice to think that we are evolving in SOME way in these current ass-backward times?

No, I'm not talking about WoW (though I have kind of been sucked back into firing that crap up multiple times each week) -- I'm talking about a way over-hyped & trendy band whose record is actually doing me right:

http://www.myspace.com/wolfparade

"Shine a Light" makes me swoon.

------------------------

Speaking of shining a light, it took about a year and a half from when I first read about it, but it seems Michael Ruppert was dead on in his assessment of the Plame case. Will Libby taking the first dive appease the public's attention span, or will the CIA see this through to completion?

http://www.kevincrouse.net/mindmeld/coup.html

Truth is stranger...

they come and go. some you squeeze.

http://www.myspace.com/drogues

Dilligent, talented, dedicated... overworked and in need of a well deserved break... a mighty congratulations to all of the TV.com developers and team! The GnE Morphing of 2005 is on.