I havent posted one of these in years because I still dont think I've really made my voice hearable. I do and say things that can seem immature at times and at other times I may seem comepletely different possibly leading some to believe I am either schitzophrenic or wishy-washy in my beliefs.

I know what I believe, and it boils down to true freedom. I dont personally believe anyone has to agree with me on my moral outlook on life, just that they accept that mine is different then theirs and they have no right to tell me I cant live how I live. Like me words are harmless and unchanging. We may create new words to belittle, or change the affect of a word but the original word will never be lost.

Some words hold more power then others, and depending on the culture that power can be unpredictable of its outcome. While I believe in positive thinking and change for the better, I know it will never happen, and I will never do anything more then blog quietly about how much I disagree with activism and intolerance.

I'm a weird guy, i've come to accept that. I say too much (or write too much in some cases) and nobody wants to read it, or in some cases im told I could've gotthe point through faster. When I figure out a way to be interesting I'll stick to that and I'll know because I wont be bored by my own projects

Well, BBCA started up a new season of Torchwood. Gotta say, the ending of season 1 was fantastic as well as the season as a whole so I was very excited to see season 2. Of course (as expected actually) they did go the route of Capt. Jacks past (alot we dont know about him even though we know more then Torchwood, there's still stuff we dont know about him). Anyway, the first episode was awesome and while some things we're silly (I think it may have been intentional actually) nothing detracted from the show and it still feels right (although some stuff about relationships between some members that are honestly unexpected cropped up so I'm interested to see whats up with this).

So, ya I'm really excited to see where thats going to go. It's always fun to watch the evolution of great shows and I've had the privilege to see this show from beginning to present so I'm interested to see where it goes. Hopefully, it doesnt end up crashing and burning like Deadzone did (man last season I watched of that was sooo lame!) and I hope it maintains itself and doesnt start rehashing certain ideals.

On other fronts, I watched The Prestige the other day. Fascinating movie. It's quite interesting to see that movies take on morality and the justifications people give themselves based on vengeance or obsession. While I did see half the secret in the movie coming from a mile away the movie really did a good job at keeping the other half a comeplete mystery to me (it was actually what I thought could never be it, cant even be sure why I thought that). If you havent seen it yet, and you like movies about obsession as well as magic and like movies set in early 1900s you should check it out. Its a fun watch, especially to see how deep Hugh Jackman's character goes over a honest mistake which did indeed change everyones lives in the movie.

In other news, everything so far is going ok for me in my new job. It's really scary to think that I need to answer these questions for people and quite often stuff crops up that I'm so scared I'm doing something wrong because I cant fix it. Everything I know is not working. I'm still trying to figure out how to get around that but if I can I think I will be fine. These people that call are very scary to me, and I try to be nice as I can but computers can be weird. Sometimes they just do what they want and you have no clue why. This happens alot to me and I really want to help but I dont have the answer. Its quite scary to me, but im trying to not worry about that. Everything will work out and I will be good at this. I just have to believe in myself. I know that.

Anyway, one step at a time, thats where life is taking me. Hopefully the last step is where I get comfortable because right now the road is rocky and I'm trying to watch my step.

Welcome to another exciting adventure of ranting and pointless drivel that endorses the eating of cheese!

I wanted to start this one off by sharing that I passed my test at work (YAY! It means I get to keep my job, and for all intensive purposes I GOT THE JOB which if it's based on tests about computer stuff I shouldnt have been worried about that, but I was) so I got my dream job (my foot in the door of the industry) doing what I want to do to pay bills in case my writing or gaming or writing about gaming never gets me anywhere (which it probably wont, but have to be optimistic there haha). So, ya I'm now a Tech Support guy and if your in an area the company I work for covers you may get me on the phone (who knows). Dont worry though odds are if your reading this you know what your doing your just baffled and dont have the resources I have to find the answer to your problem. Also dont worry because I really am a nice guy, I just need to vent where no one will hear it and it would appear either no one likes my blogs (which is perfectly fine) or else I havent found an interesting hook yet to make it worth being sociable with me. Whatever, its cool. Just dont be scared of me, im not gonna bite yer head off! Well, maybe haha... No promises

Anyway all kidding aside I have now got a dilemma on my hands pertaining to my EQ2 endeavour which really encompasses more then one topic today actually. Sometime around the end of this year the game I've been waiting for should be ready to come out (heres hoping) and I will have to say goodbye to the guild/community I have in EQ2. Unfortunately that guild/community is not very big and more importantly to me not very fun all the time (not always someone on, not always stuff to do) so I really do want to move on from it. The game, outside of the small guilds (like the one im in), is totally run by elitists making it no fun to play (the game is designed entirely around raiding which requires PEOPLE which all the big elitist guilds have so bleh... the game gets boring). I do have to be honest though I really like playing with the people there and dont want to leave. I wanted to get this guild moving and have a steady stream of content for alot of people along a good and fun atmosphere at any time of the day (like a decent guild should have and I've only pulled this off twice in other games) but I'm not sure if this guild would ever be able to get that far and as fun as these people are they cant (lets be real... pratical about this) be around enough so... I dont know. I cant see myself staying with the game for very much longer. It's not really the game I want to play anyway, and I'm hoping this game I want to play will keep me around for years to come. I'd love that!

So, that sucks and it leads me into my next topic of pointlessness... The new game Stargate Worlds is in Development! YA, I know, shocker right. I was also told development stopped but only recently found out it was picked up again and the ball is rolling. The devs there are incredible. They almost seemed to have researched everything about current MMOs and want to encopmpass really whats more practical gameplay for MMOs rather then money sucking but overall pointless gameplay that ends up making you feel like you wasted months of your life.

I also want to point out here I am a huge fan of the show + movie but I'm trying to keep that in the backburner and only use that when it comes to how I feel the game should feel (there are things in the world of Stargate you just cant do and if you do I just want a good reason that you did). Also I had some concerns about the way the armor looked (too halo-ish for me, and not pratical in the stargate world) but that was quashed when a Dev (I know right, a dev answered someone back about this, actually several times devs have talked to the community about this) pretty much said "dont worry thats not the only concept we have" (im paraphrasing, but thats in context).

If you havent seen it yet check out the teaser they put together. Its old news to most people now but who knows, you may learn about it here so I'll link it for ya, just click here, the video is in the video area of that page. Also has some good interviews you can read if your interested at all. I suggest you read all the interviews released so far if your at all interested in this game. It is going to be way different from most MMOs out right now and it may be really fun who knows. Of course this is all speculation at this point, and only going off of what they say but it sounds fresh and I cant wait to check this game out whenever (either beta or live whatever I just cant wait!) it comes into my hands to play it.

Anyway, thats about it for this week. Alot of craziness, but I try to stay focused... keep my chi in tact. You may have noticed I didnt cuss this week. Well, im not mad about anything right now I'm actually in a good place and hoping for the best. It's going to be a rough month (cant pay bills yet) but overall im very excited for the future for once. Here's hopin all goes well for me, right!

Additional Stargate Worlds Resources:

Stargate Worlds Wiki

IGN: Stargate worlds Explored

Official Stargate Worlds Website

Official Stargate Worlds Forums

GameSpots Interview for those uninterested in searching for it

Warcry's Interview with Kevin Balentine

Theres more if you want to look for them but these are probably the best out right now. You can also find alot of great stuff on the offical website/forums, and see some more special stuff just by registering for the forums... if your at all interested in this game I suggest you check that out. For now, I have no good quip for you, but keep it real!

Tigers tails and sleeping bulls and stuff... what?

Hello out there in lala land.

Gonna start this off with great news. I got a real job this time. Starting off with training will be part time, if I pass the training I will get to keep the job and go on to full time. Well, really I will just be making my own hours but I want to do full time. I'm gonna be working for an outsourcing company doing Tech Support. Going to be awesome to see how well I can do and as always I hope to give them a driven, motivated team player that wants to instill new life into the world of Compuer Tech.

So yay me, I'm still awesome, and funny thing about that actually- I got that job only 3 days after my last blog post. Eerie, kinda weird, and superb all at the same time. Maybe thats Irony, but I dont really care to figure that out.

In other news, I know its not just irking me, but it really bothers me how so many people want to censor things in the entertainment industry in general (including gaming). These people do nothing but work all day on pointless excursions to find ways to inject their viewpoint into how I live my life. While many timelessly encrouch upon my freedom of speech (an American Right, among many others) I find it funny that they dont just blatantly encroach on my fredom of religion, as it's usually their religion that tells them (or how they view their religion rather) that what they are doing is right. Do these people not realize they are no better then Hitler How dare they tell me what I can and cannot say! How dare they tell anyone what they can and cannot say on tv, the news, in games, magazines... **** you and your almighty righteous horse. Get off the ****ing horse and stop living in a dream world where everything is all roses and flowers cus you never had to worry about real money issues your whole life, Or a friend getting shot.

While they sit in their offices making these protest notes, and writing up their hateful speeches they never stop to think that what they are doing is making them the bad guy. People enjoy violent material and insane dialogue when its used properly. There is a way to make a violent game with cussing from here to china, if you direct the game to move at a thoughful pace and have a point to the violence and words being used. Of course these people who want to censor have no clue what any of that means, I have a feeling their brain fell out sometime during a church meeting somewhere, and I know God didnt tell them to crucify others for what they believe. Even though I am agnostic I know quite a bit about religions and find it fascinating how even that gets its touch of the almighty censor. You hear what your church believes, not what any God wants you to hear.

I dont know who God is, but hes definitely not the guy with the bible used for beating people over the head. As far as I'm concerned as hypocritical as most in that religion are theyre about as "real" a belief structure as Buddha is to me. I actually prefer Buddhist Ideology over-all anyway. They dont bash people for disagreeing they embrace all people and religions. There are some extents that I diagree with but thats ok, and I definitely dont believe in the almighty buddha but thats also ok. I dont have to agree to get along with people, I also dont need to protest about things I disagree with to make people notice me. Go back home and eat another 100$ bill you rich yuppie, get the **** out of my entertainment. I enjoy the games I play and the movies I watch, not all of which are violent nor have curse words. Strangely enough according to these people I'm probably a serial killer because I have and watch movies like Death Proof and Natural Born Killers. Both good movies, great stories, superb acting. What makes them offensive? Well lets see,in some ways NBK was intended to be a slap in the face of the man at the same time as being over the top and weird. You have to know how to translate or rather-even better- understand it to appreciate it. Otherwise, it's not your cup of tea and thats fine. Just dont watch it, stop trying to tell me I cant watch it. Same goes with games.

Well I dont know who all reads my blogs, but whoever does I assure you I appreciate it. Nothing makes me happier then to know people agree or disagree with me enough to read what I have to say. I also want to state that my views are my own and I in no way wish you to agree with me nor do I want to influence you. Quite the contrary I want you to think for yourself. One major thing my Father taught me was to always think for myself, have my own opinoins, and know how to express them. I have developed this unique talent in such a way that I also want to respect other people's opinoins and whenever I know them I will share them as such. If you do have a differing opinoin about anything I say at any time, please feel free to tell me so in any fashion (comment, email, IM, slap in the face, whatever). I am quite outspoken on my opinoins but I really dont intend to offend anyone with them, merely incite a mature debate.

Anyway, as all things go I am in a rut. I currently have a crappy job in which I barely get any hours, and I quite loathe because they have to use me because they know I am loyal. All I want is to work hard for a company, so I can make money and go home. I think thats what we all want. For some reason though, people in the computer industry wont hire me. Possibly because I'm honest, brash, scary, weird, not like them (I dont want to say nerd, they arent ALL nerds but some are and while I'm a MAJOR GEEK which I say proudly I'm not a nerd) but I have never had anything against anyone let alone nerds so I dont know why they dont like me nor do they want to hire me.

Whining about job placement aside, however, I have noticed that I keep missing out on upcoming game releases as well as Mods for games I like. I think i'm doing something wrong because everyone seems to know about these things ahead of time except me.

On the MMO front, I am playing CoX franchise for this month while I job search (thats a great game to play casually and I recommend it. If you care at all I'll be reviewing it for your reading pleasure after this current rant). I remebered quickly why I cant play that game on a regular basis, as unfortunately the player base isnt big enough to always allow for you to get a group. Doesnt really matter what level you are it's just how it is. Although if you play Hero Side (figures although in this case I dont blame people for this, theres more content/maps/badges on the hero side so it really is more fun to play) you tend to get more groupage then you get on Villain side.

One great thing about this game is most (sadly not all) players of this grand game are the nicest players you'll ever meet with the few exceptions of Jackasses who think Im their heal slave and I need to make my timers move faster then theyre intended because they play a dps class and dont manage their aggro and blame me when they die. Total **** tards! These elitist types should be lined up and shot because they annoy the crap out of me, and I dont think they know how dumb they are making them even more useless to the human condition.

I know I'm not the coolest person in the world (even though I certainly believe I am the most awesome) but I dont see why people expect (key word is expect) others to do things the way they do as if thats the RIGHT way. **** you, my way is just fine and I was doin great until you came along to try and tell me why I'm inadequate because I dont play like you. Moron!

I will leave you with this, in life you have one chance to prove your intelligence. When it comes you better be ready because if you fail, you're stupid for life.