Fatal Things to Say To Your Pregnant Wife

Sure you'll get your figure back. We'll just search 1985 where you left it.

Keys are in the fridge, honey. I'll see you at the hospital at hafe-time.

Sure, the doctor said your eating for two, but he didn't mean two orcas.

How come you're so much fatter than the other chicks in Lamaze.

Whats the big deal? If you can handle me goin in, surely you can handle a baby coming out!

Why in the world would I want to rub your feet?

Yo, Fatarse! You're blocking the TV!

That's not a bun in the oven, it's the whole friggin backery!

Get you own ice cream, Buddha!

Just some more practise.